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Payoffs for Not Succeeding
Strange as it may sound, there are payoffs when we don't succeed. What you may exclaim?? Before you dismiss this statement read the following explanation on what payoffs you might be gaining from not succeeding.Ask yourself the following questions.1. What do I get to avoid?-Responsibility, love, success, visibility, etc.2. Who do I get to punish and/or love?-Parents didn't love me enough.-I will not be happy to punish mom and/or dad, who wants me to be happy.-Childhood was really awful--nobody cares anyway no matter what I do.-I won't let my parents say, "I guess we didn't do so badly after all." i.e. parents are assuaging their guilt by owning my success.-I will not do better than my parents because...
Why Do Some Kids Win So Much and Other Kids Do Not Care About Winning?
Some people see superstars of young children at an early age. Is it superior genes? Some of the parents like to say it is, their genes of course. Yet is it superior bloodlines or just careful nurture or even pushing kids way too hard in their early years? And what is superior genes anyway, as a kid can win the Science Fair, perhaps get straight As or be a super star athlete. But what happens when a kid seems to be so good at everything they do?This subject recently came up when discussing royal bloodlines in an online think tank and over 1 million Americans have royal bloodlines and often these kids are fairly competitive in nature. Now then, without...
Extra-Cute Baby Outfits
Parents live vicariously through their children and play dress-up. One of the joys of being the parent of an infant comes in the form of choosing cute outfits for the baby to wear. Over the years, parents have narrowed this down to an art, finding and choosing the most adorable outfits that they can imagine and making it seem that every day is Halloween for their infants and toddlers. While scary and grotesque outfits rarely show up on a baby even during the actual Halloween holiday, there are plenty of parents that like to dress their sons as baseball players and their daughters as princesses. ItÂs almost as if the parents start to relive a second childhood through their infants and...
Help My Preteen/Teenager is Driving Me Nuts!
Do you feel like someone has abducted your sweet, innocent child and replaced them with a monster? Are you confused that somehow you have gone from knowing everything as a parent, to knowing absolutely nothing? Welcome to being a parent of a preteen/teenager. It is a brave new world. Being a preteen/teenager is difficult and being a parent of one is difficult as well. In this article, I will address just a few of the many normal aspects of adolescence and how to survive as a parent.I have been a therapist for over 18 years now and have seen hundreds of adolescents. If I had a dollar for every time a parent said to me, If I talked the...
Parental Involvement In Learning
Whether children attend public or private schools, they benefit when parents become involved in their education. According to the National Institute for Literacy, when parents or other family members frequently read to children entering kindergarten, those children were at a distinct advantage over children whose families read to them less often. The Early Childhood Longitudinal Study found that "Children who were read to at least three times a week by a family member were almost twice as likely to score in the top 25 percent in reading than children who were read to less than three times a week." The study also found that, of children who were read to at least three times a week: * 76 percent had mastered the...
How You Can Be a Better Parent
When it comes to parenting tips how are you going to know if you are going to receive the right kind of response to what your question may be. In reality you dont know if you are getting the right answer because each and every child is different as well as the situation that they are in and having.When you are looking for a little bit of parenting advice you may want to look a friend that did have the same problem that you are having and talk to them about what some solutions that they could have found that did work. You are even able to talk to your doctor about any problems that you are having...
O Be Careful
Let us with caution indulge the supposition that morality can be maintained without religion. Reason and experience both forbid us to expect that our national morality can prevail in exclusion of religious principle." President George WashingtonOne of my favorite parts about leading the Cherub Choir3, 4 and 5 year-oldsat church is that it gives me the privilege of presenting Biblical messages in their simplest form. What with these kids being barely able to sit still for more than one verse at a time, everything in our short practice period is reduced to the lowest possible denominator. Snack-time is reduced to one Starburst candy upon arrival (to wake up their singing mouths); story-time is reduced to does anyone have an emergency...
I'm a Mom, She's a Mom: Being an Adult with Your Parents
On one of her quarterly visits to see her grandson, my three-year-old son, my mother ignores the available front seat of the car, crowds into the back next to the car seat and promptly unwraps a lollipop. Feeling the tension rising, I recall the numerous conversations where I so proudly tell my mother how I keep sugar away from my son. Mom, what are you doing? Havent you heard a word I said? And so it starts. The struggle of being an adult with my parent.So much is written today about taking care of our parents as they age. Monitoring medical care, determining living arrangements and providing emotional support are the new roles that...
White Sun - Love
Between the father and son, it is said that, Feeding your son but not teaching him, you do not really love your son. Teaching your son but not strict enough, you are putting him in danger and bringing him harm. Be attentive to small things and be cautious with minor mistakes, there wont be any loss in the end in loving your son. In seeking good-fortunes for the children by collecting gold for them, it is not certain that they can keep the wealth. In creating good-fortunes for the children by collecting virtues for them, boundless blessings will they receive.In teaching how to live in peace and love, it is said, There is no one who does not love his...
Fatty Food Companies Go On Tough Public Relations Diet
Since 1975, obesity rates among U.S. children have more than doubled -- and more than tripled among kids aged 6 to 11. Lawmakers, consumer groups and class-action attorneys are increasingly laying the blame for this trend on the "deceptive" marketing campaigns of major food companies.Gradually -- too gradually for their own good -- food companies such as McDonald's and Kraft have recognized the obesity trend as a PR crisis that needs to be addressed head-on.Marketing food (or anything else) to children is a touchy subject. As parents know, many advertisers aggressively use the "nag factor" to push product. They want children to bug their parents until the parents break down ("OK, OK, I'll take you to McDonald's if you promise...
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